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Eats Street
MARKET WATCH
With Trader Joe's colonizing one end of 14th Street and the new Balducci's imperiously staking its claim to the other, the boulevard has suddenly become to gourmet food, according to one store manager, "what Times Square was to porn." Here's an opinionated checklist of where to buy what in New York's newest gourmet gulch. R.R. & R.P.
1 Western Beef
403A W., nr. Ninth Ave.; 212-989-6572
PERSONALITY TYPE: Buy-in-bulk survivalist bargain hunters with adequate storage space for items like Hellmann's by the $11.99 gallon tub.
AMBIENCE: Buckling floors, plastic car-washstyle slatted curtains, neighborhoodappropriate bloodstains in the meat department. (With plans to move to Tenth and 16th this spring, there's no reason to renovate.)
STRENGTHS: Latin American produce like red or white yautia and Panamanian name; rare finds like Sylvia's canned collards and Tang; specials on items like Maruchan's instant soup, $1.69 per six-pack.
WEAKNESSES: Limited brand selection, lessthan-appetizing displays, and longish waits even when the lines are relatively short.
HIGHLIGHT: The famous 30-degree-Fahrenheit meat room, with its shrink-wrapped tripe, beef hearts, and cow's feet.
POINT-OF-PURCHASE TEMPTATION: Yodels.
PREPARE TO HUM: "Ain't No Stoppin' Us Now."
ONE-STOP-SHOPPING RATING (OUT OF 10): 7 for regular folks, 2 for food snobs.
2 Balducci's
301 W., at Eighth Ave.; 212-741-3700
PERSONALITY TYPE: The exceptionally wellheeled gastronome with a subscription to The Art of Eating, plus lazy non-cooks looking to pass off culinary director Katy Sparks s lamb burgers and panko-crumbed mac and cheese as their own.
AMBIENCE:...