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Jayden (7 months) is fussy, and the usual ways to help calm her are not working. Mia, her caregiver, knew this might happen. Today is the first day for Jayden without her mom, Tammy, who just left on a four-month deployment with the National Guard. Jayden's father, Eric, looks stressed and sad this morning at drop-off.
Mia is glad that she brainstormed strategies with Jayden's parents several months ago, when they first learned Tammy was going to be away. Mia learned that Eric and Tammy already shared responsibilities for Jayden's care. They had started planning for Eric to assume all the caregiving tasks before Tammy left, so Jayden would have an easier time with this transition. Today, Mia knows Jayden probably needs extra nurturing and patience. She plans to play for Jayden a recording of Tammy singing.
Mia is also glad that she has built in a few extra minutes at pickup time to talk to Eric about how things are going. She has a new idea to share with him. She asks Eric to bring in one of Tammy's T-shirts, one that she has worn a lot. It will have Tammy's scent on it, and Mia is pretty sure that that smell will help comfort Jayden. Mia can use it to wrap Jayden as she holds, feeds, and comforts her.
Eric brings in one of Tammy's T-shirts the next day. He also reports that when he tried that strategy at home, it helped Jayden settle more quickly. He has emailed Tammy, and she plans to send home shirts regularly to help Jayden remember her and be comforted by her smell, even though Tammy is thousands of miles away.
What the research tells us
Helping children cope with separation from their families is something teachers do daily. Learning to separate from a trusted caregiver and knowing he will return is a major developmental task for infants and toddlers. It is typical for a separation reaction to emerge between 6 and 8 months of age, and again around 18 months of age, as young children develop strong attachments to the significant people in their lives. Some children handle transitions more easily than others. Some...